It's hard to change

So for the last few years I've been thinking more and more about wanting to break out of the materialistic, consumeristic American life I have always led. I don't want to be obsessed with getting the new TV or new clothes or a new CD or DVD. It's so easy to buy things for ourselves to make ourselves happy. Shopping can easily become our favorite hobby. For a few months Andrea and I have been working on getting to a point where we can survive on less income and consume less of everything. We've taken some good steps...canceling cable, using coupons at the grocery store, making lunch and dinner at our house instead of going out, drastically slowing down how much clothes we buy...but last night I reminded myself how far I have to go.
I want a Powerbook or ibook. I REALLY want a Powerbook or ibook. Actually, I really do need one as I make a transition to working with ReIMAGINE and spend more time in coffee shops and BART and no longer have an office. But...it's become an obsession. I can't tell you how many hours I've spent on www.Craigslist.com and www.mac.com in the past couple weeks. I think it is safe to say I am now an expert on used and new versions of Powerbooks and ibooks. I've made offers. I've emailed back and forth with people. I call or email my friend Darin a couple times a day for advice. I've read product reviews. Meanwhile my wife and daughter play in the living room while I look at just one more site or check Craigslist one more time. Last night I hit rock bottom. There was a post on Craigslist about a way to get a free ibook. Of course, these are usually bogus, but I just couldn't let it go. I had to try. To make a long story short, I ended up signing up for a 14 day trial of Real Rhapsody and MyDailyDose (vitamins). For MyDailyDose I had to pay 5.95 for my FREE trial of the vitamins that are going to change my life. The website had led me to believe if I signed up for two deals on one page, I could get the free ibook. But then when I clicked to move on, I found out that I had to sign up for 2 offers on 3 successive pages, and the 3rd page consisted of offers costing hundreds of dollars. So I wasted about 3 hours and $5.95 on the dream of getting a free ibook.
If I would have taken 5 seconds to breathe and rest and pray, I probably would have realized that I should have gone out and talked to my wife, who was working on postcards we are sending out about a luncheon to let people know how they can support us and the work with ReIMAGINE.
What did I learn? It's really, really hard to get out of a consumeristic way of living, and even if I truly do need to buy something, that doesn't mean it is okay to become enamored and obsessed with it.

Pray for me

If you are reading this please pray for me. I am in the middle of transitioning from a secure full-time youth pastor position to raising support to work with a non-profit. The day to have the money taken care of looms in the distance, coming quickly.
May I have the faith and trust to believe that God is going to catch us, that God would not take us this far into a beautiful situation with ReIMAGINE, and then just drop us and forget us. May I remember that God is good and that He will provide.

The Church (and those churches)

"When we have been wounded by the Church, our temptation is to reject it. But when we reject the Church it becomes very hard for us to keep in touch with the living Christ. When we say, 'I love Jesus, but I hate the Church,' we end up losing not only the Church but Jesus too." (Henri Nouwen)

Thanks to Dan Kimball's blog for reminding me of this quote by Nouwen. If you are like me you know plenty of people who have been hurt by a local church community. How can we continue to love the Bride of Christ, His Church, when so many are so wounded by the individual local communities. Is it a copout to say that we can love the "Big C", the Church, the Body of Christ, but we can remain angry and bitter towards local churches? Those of us who say we follow Jesus know that Jesus clearly taught to love and to forgive. What would it look like for people to forgive the local church communities that have wounded them? Would it be an important part of their healing process?

Barna's new book Revolution

George Barna, evangelical author and researcher extraordinaire, seems to be making some shifts in his thinking and the focus of how he will spend his life...especially interesting is what he says about the state of the local church in America and its decreasing influence and importance...
Check out a good review at http://tallskinnykiwi.typepad.com/
tallskinnykiwi/2005/08/george_barnas_r.html#more

Spiritual Consumers

For years I've been convinced that Christians in America act as consumers and that this fact has played a major role in the dismal state of the church today. We go to a church because their music is the style we like or the Children's Ministry makes our kids happier or it is easy to find a good parking spot or the lobby is pretty or they have good coffee or er can get in and out without talking to anyone if we don't want to...you get the drift.
I spent part of my morning today at a meeting to discuss changes in the small group structure at the church where I have been on staff for a few years. It was a fascinating meeting, and it got me thinking. Are we all as incredibly selfish and self-centered as we appear to be? Have people always been like this? Everything is about ME, MY and I. What about MY small group? How will I be affected? What if I like my current group? What if I don't like the church curriculum? What if I don't want to change? Will this be convenient for ME? Will there be people who I will like? Will there be people MY age?
I suppose in a sense we must think like this, because each one of us is responsible for our own spiritual growth and maturity. So is it okay to be spiritual consumers? We have to think about ourselves and how we can help ourselves follow Jesus, but there still seems to be something incredibly wrong here. Everyone is looking out for number one. Everyone has such a hard time putting the needs of the many in front of the needs of the few, or the one.

With this attitude is something else that hit me in the face this morning. People in churches don't like to be told what to do. You can suggest something, but don't ever, ever tell me I have to do it. That just wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be convenient, and it wouldn't be appropriate, and I just wouldn't like it, because I can figure it out for myself. Don't try to mess with my life here.
Should today's pastors have the right to say, "Yes, we are all going to do this, and we are going to do it this way at this church"? I for one would be a little scared by this approach. I just may have some problems trusting leaders, and I've seen pastor do some pretty ridiculously stupid things. At the same time,when I read the Bible I can't imagine many of the leaders suggesting some nice things to try...if they seem like a good idea to you.

24

I sure am excited to watch season 4...my wife and I watched our first episode a couple months ago and promptly watched the first 3 seasons on DVD. It would not be unfair to say I have become a little obsessed with the whole thing.

Me: "We gotta watch more tonight. Honey, I can go to Blockbuster right now with the free coupon and get the next disc. We'll just watch one episode...okay, a half an episode...c'mon honey, it's only midnight...?"
Andrea: "Whatever you say..."

Fundraising as Ministry

I've been thinking a lot lately about fundraising for ministry, since that is what I am supposedly doing this month. I've never been much of a salesman or a big talker, so that is not exactly the type of fundraiser I will be. A couple months ago I stumbled upon a booklet by Henri Nouwen entitled The Spirituality of Fundraising. I would highly recommend it to anyone thinking about raising funds or support for ministry:
"If we come back from asking someone for money and we feel exhausted and somehow tainted from unspiritual activity, something is wrong. We must not let ourselves be tricked into thinking that fund-raising is only a secular activity. As a form of ministry, fund-raising is as spiritual as giving a sermon, entering a time of prayer, visiting the sick, or feeding the hungry. So fund-raising has to help us with our conversion too. Are we willing to be converted from our fear of asking, our anxiety oabout being rejected or feeling humiliated, our depression when someone says, 'No, I'm not going to get involved with your project'? When we have gained the freedom to ask without fear, to love fund-raising as a form of ministry, then fund-raising will be good for our spiritual life..."
As my friend Mark said the other day, I wish I could write like Nouwen.

First Post

Andrea and I just created this blog so that we can share what is happening with us as we transition into a new phase of life. We plan on posting as often as possible, so please check back and keep us in your thoughts and prayers.